Wearing Purple Today - A Call to End Commitment to Procrastinate

Today is a day that I'm wearing purple* it is a colour that may be being seen around the world on a lot of people. The reason being that today has been set aside as a day to highlight gay bullying and the recent spate of teen suicides that have been directly related to it.

Many of you have said through various means how much my personal experience posted at start of the month moved you. If you haven't already take a look but be warned tissues are a pre-requisite for clicking that link (as indeed they are for me to read the comments).

Last night I attended a consultation for the LGBT sector in Northern Ireland into the Office of the First Minister and deputy First Minister's (OFMDFM's) Programme for Cohesion, Sharing and Integration (CSI). The major problem of the document is that it focuses merely on racism and sectarianism whilst ignoring other diversities and minority groups as laid out in Northern Irish legislation, (disability, victims of conflict and their families, LGBT and women amongst them).

There is a passing reference that this will set in place a timetable to bring in a sexual orientation strategy. This is a bone of contention within the LGBT community in Northern Ireland. There was already a consultation document for a Sexual Orientation Strategy on LGB (note the lack of T). A question has been asked by Stephen Farry MLA (Alliance) about a firm commitment to a timetable for this.

"Will the junior Minister give a firm commitment of a timetable within which the strategy will be brought to fruition? In doing so, will he bear in mind that a commitment was given to the Committee for the Office of the First Minister and deputy First Minister back in 2009 that such a strategy would be brought forward shortly?"

The Junior Minister for the OFMDFM Robin Newton in response said:

"a realistic assessment of the time needed to give due consideration to the issues raised and to complete consultation indicates that the timescale for publication would be no earlier than 2012."

Not before 2012! It is getting somewhat outrageous the timescale that his particular consultation is taking. The omission then from naming homophobic or transphobic hate crimes by name but is a ghostly and other types gloss over is galling in the draft CSI programme. In what turned out to be almost the last word last night I said:

"While the ministers of OFMDFM are telling us not before 2012. This is not a commitment to do anything, merely a commitment to procrastinate."

• 98% of LGBT young people suffered homophobic bullying at school.
• 30% of this school bullying was by adults
• 66% have contemplated suicide

These figures are startling and in a programme that says it will help young people at risk is ignoring some very much as risk young people by it omission and failure to look at a holistic sense of society and cohesion. It is written with the history of Northern Ireland controlling it and not looking to the present and vitally the future where there are multiple idenities rather than where you really feel you should be on a Sunday morning.


* Not this time to Take Back Parliament which also uses the colour.

Purple Solidarity for LGBTQ Youth Bullied or Suicidal

READ: ****This event was not created by me. It was created by someone who cares deeply on Tumblr, and I am only spreading the word. (via Davey Wavey)****

It's been decided. On October 20th, 2010, we will wear purple in honor of the 6 gay boys who committed suicide in recent weeks/months due to homophobic abuse in their homes and at their schools. Purple represents Spirit on the LGBTQ flag and that's exactly what we'd like all of you to have with you: spirit. Please know that times will get better and that you will meet people who will love you and respect you for who you are, no matter your sexuality. Please wear purple on October 20th. Tell your friends, family, co-workers, neighbors and schools. RIP Tyler Clementi, Asher Brown, Seth Walsh, Justin Aaberg, Raymond Chase and Billy Lucas. You are loved.

Join this event and invite everyone on your friends list. Don't let their deaths be for nothing. Let it mean something, and let's do something to change this country for once.

If my recent blog posts haven't been enough to persuade you to join me wearing purple this Wednesday, here is Fort Worth councillor Joel Burns sharing part of his experience for the first time in the chamber.

I'm Not a Statistic...But Came So Close

For the moment Tyler Clementi (18) is the most infamous teen suicide victim, but in time he will become a statistic. Just like Raymond Chase (19), Seth Walsh (13), Asher Brown (15), and Billy Lucas (13), five other young gay American teens who have taken their life in recent weeks however over time he may well turn into just another statistic.

They were all bullied at school. Now they were a mix of races, mix of locations, the one common denominator is that they were all gay and they had all in some way been bullied because of it. As a seventeen year old I too almost became one of those statistics for exactly the same reasons. I stood at the end of the breakwater in town on a particularly stormy day knowing if I took one further step I would be crushed by the breakers against the concrete before anyone could get near me, or indeed the RNLI Lifeboat could be launched from across the marina.

As an adult while out one night I actually was able as a confident out man to run into one of the people who had actually bullied me for being gay at school. Someone who had physically beaten me unless I ran, who hurled names at me. It was something I myself was in denial of at that time, unlike (from what I read) the five young men who are no longer with us.

But on that Saturday I went up to that former bully of me and said just three simple words, "You were right."

I got a stare back, then a "What?"


So I expanded, "You were right, I am gay, and it doesn't make me any less of a man."

There are those who have known me over the past 24 years. Those who have known what I have done, either for them personally or for a group of people they know or are involved with, who may actually say it makes me more of a man. There has been so much in the last 24 years that I have been able to give to others. Some of it sure is because of my sexuality, most of it is in spite or irrelevant to that aspect of my life.

Sadly the world is missing out on what Tyler, Raymond, Seth, Asher and Billy have got to offer in the years that should still be ahead of them. Sadly it is also missing out on some of the people I've known personally who are more that just a mere statistic. Some of whom did come to me for help along the way, some of whom couldn't handle it for whatever reason ended it. There are others that I know have thought about ending their own lives but haven't and are still with us, still having a lot to give.

Reading the details of some of these stories over recent weeks has brought a lot of memories back. Ones that make me want to curl up in a ball and shut the world out. But something the last 24 years has led me to do is be someone who speaks out.

Here is where Stonewall have it right we need to end homophobic bullying wherever it happens; schools, churches, workplaces, public transport, anywhere. However, it happens while there is not equality and without equality some will always see it as not-normal, sub-normal even. However, as my statement above said being me, being gay, hasn't made me any less of a man.

I've run at a high level, debated with confidence with politicians and leaders of parties, deal with senior bosses of a multi-national company prepared to say no if the answer actually is no. None of these things is dependent on my sexuality but on attributes or skills that are as intrinsic a part of me of who I fall in love with.

The skills of too many young gay men, or lesbian women are being lost to our world while others bully them to the point they cannot take it. Those of us they trust can only reach out so far and can't be there 24/7/365.

Something else that came out of last night's discussion was that when we were teenagers struggling with our sexuality there weren't gay role models, either on the national stage or who we knew personally. That is a lot easier now to find in Northern Ireland and I hope in parts of the USA, but it isn't always easy. However, comments from leaders in fields that young people look up to like the one made by 50 Cent whatever its intention do not make things easy. Other teens then feel it is alright to carry on with the gay bashing. The fact that in teen slang 'gay' means something is bad leads to extra pressure these days.

Or course heterosexual teens are bullied as well. Heterosexual teens also take their own lives. But the reasons for bullying them do not seem in some small way to be institutionalised by the difference in status, available status etc that is afforded to them over LGBT teens. Normalisation needs to happen through full equality.

Probe Into Bullying Helpline's Action - But Main Issue Still the Bullying

Fear over public trust in charities that run confidential helplines has led the Charities Commission to launch a probe into the National Bullying Helpline (NBH).

The Commission said it had a duty to "promote public trust and confidence in charities, and is aware of the potential impact on other charities that run confidential help lines". Also that is sought to "ensure the trustees continue to protect this confidential and sensitive information" and have also made an order "preventing the transmission or disclosure of information, including details about the nature and source of the confidential calls it has received" without its permission.

NBH founder Christine Pratt had at the weekend identified in all but name members of Downing Street staff who had called in confidence seeking assistance. All the charities patrons had resigned by the end of Monday over the leakage of information. The Charity Commission had received 160 complaints and the service of NBH was suspended yesterday.

The action had also come after Max Clifford has told Mrs Pratt she needed to provide evidence to back up her claims. The action taken by the charity commission will be a stop of such information becoming public and the protection of those who sought advise.

The one issue though is that there may yet be a case to be answered to within Downing Street, the way the information has been released is not following due process. The denials from Downing Street even starting before the allegations in Sunday's Observer from Andrew Rawnsley's book show that there is over sensitivity there on this issue. The crux of the story is still whether there was bullying at the heart of Government. So while NBH have done themselves and confidential helplines some harm in the public perception from their actions they have highlighted an issue that needs addressing.

Bullying Helpline Patron Quits - Update Make that two, no three

Professor Cary Cooper has just announced that he has quit the National Bullying Helpline (NBH) the organisation at the heart of the Brown bullying enquiries and concerns about the confidentiality of those who have called it. Prof. Cooper an expert in workplace stress told the BBC that he was "really upset" adding:

"[As] a helpline or counselling service you never, ever reveal anything to do with when a client calls you in any way."

Another bullying charity Bulling UK had said on its website yesterday it was "horrified" that Christine Pratt CEO of the NBH had "all but identified" one caller in media interviews. Speaking of the serious nature of such disclosure they said:

"It's hard to imagine a more serious breach of confidentiality."

With Professor Cooper's departure today serious questions need to be asked about this incident, not just the leakage of the material but now that they have been exposed the claims of those who had called.

UPDATE: A second patron TV presenter Sarah Cawood has also announced that she has stepped down. Another Patron Ann Widdecombe MP has also expressed concerns about recent events:

"The helpline is supposed to be confidential and while no details were revealed I do not think it is a good idea."

UPDATE 2: No sooner had a published the last update than tweetdeck alerted me to the fact that Ann Widdecombe is also stepping down. In a statement Ms Cawood said that the reason she is stepping down said:

"In light of the recent events where confidential phone calls were made public, I feel it is no longer a campaign with which I would like my name to be associated."

However, Christine Pratt apparently fire fighting said:

"Her role as a patron has been disappointing and she has not got involved in spite of making many promises," she said.

"Appointing her as a patron was with hindsight a mistake."

Nick Clegg Sets Out the Real Gay Rights' Agenda

Earlier this week David Cameron made what looked like an ad hoc adjustment to his income tax marriage person's allowance announcement when he added in civil partnerships. After the slap dash 50 minutes in which he took to clarify his position when he first announced those plans, this addendum looked like an add on from policy wonks to answer some, though not all of the inequality questions his proposal raised.

Nick Clegg this morning talking in The Independent goes further than any other leader ever has to knock out the last few areas of inequality for the gay community. He's basically saying enough of 'equal but different' why can't we just be equal.


Education

First up Nick calls for all schools to adopt anti-homophobia bullying policies and to teach that homosexuality exists and is normal. This he wants to apply even to faith schools. Many people grow up in a faith community feeling they are isolated, the feelings that they are going through are not something they can share with teachers, fellow pupils or whatever because of the way that homosexuality is treated. It can, and does, lead to depression in a number of people. Of course such feeling are not exclusive to such an school environment, but they do accentuate it in a faith school environment. At least having access to information and feeling more able to talk about it is something that people who actually are of that faith and find themselves to be gay need as much as every other teenager in our country.

As for protection from homophobic bullying, not every child has the opportunity long after the bullying ceases to go up to the bully and say, "You know you were right". To looks of confusion from the bully like I did a few years back.

Equal Marriage

Nick is calling for the same marital rights for gay men and women as straight couples. The Tories appear to be wanting to tinker around the edges of this, acknowledge it in the tax code but not much else. David Cameron talked earlier this week about extending the 'marriage' allowance to include 'civil partnerships' Nick wants to make those unions marriage. By full marital rights Nick is also saying that those that want a same sex marriage to be solemnised within a faith may do so if they find a clergyman or woman willing to do so. He's not forcing the churches, mosques, synagogues or whatever to all carry out such ceremonies merely allowing those who are inclined the option of being involved in such a ceremony where currently they are banned.

On this issue Nick has said:

"If we don’t want to discriminate, why do we make differences in language? Language is a hugely important signifier of how we segment society and how you seek to create differences between people. Since we don’t want to make differences on this and the law has moved a great deal to do that, we should be linguistically the same too."

Blood ban

As I said at Scottish Spring Conference last year, there is fallacy in the Blood Transfusion Services definition of "risky" sexual behaviour of those who donate. It isn't actually based on behaviour it is based on a categorisation of an entire section of the population, ignoring more risky sexual practitioners in the straight community over the safer members of the gay one. Recently I read another article about the shortage of O negative blood as a result of the recent cold weather, crying out for donors to come forward. My O neg of course could have helped if they'd only let me.

Asylum seekers

Currently there is no recognition that someone fleeing their country for sexual persecution can seek asylum in this country. We have sent back young men to some countries where they face certain death for admitting they are gay. We offer such protection for those who are politically or religiously persecuted. These people if they are faced with eminent danger should they be returned home will often face a favourable hearing for their case for asylum.

This of course is not about immigration but offering help to those who face persecution. Even the Christians would have to own up that Jesus told them to help those who face persecution, he didn't put any provisos unto that appeal.

On the issue of asylum seekers Nick added:

"It's a moral stain on our collective consciousnesses. The public debate has transformed asylum seekers into threats rather than human beings."

He said Lib Dem policy would be that Britain should provide sanctuary to those fleeing persecution because of their sexual orientation:

"It’s not just me that says this, it’s international law that says it."

Uganda

For those that do not know Uganda are currently debating a new policy that will lock up anyone involved in homosexual practices for live. Any who are HIV positive or who have AIDS face summary execution. Considering the rate of HIV infection on the African continent this could well turn into a cull. After all the use of HIV may well turn into the only 'evidence' that homosexual activity took place.

As with the asylum regulations above this is something we could not condone. While most of those asylum seekers come from countries where we may well have little sway with sanctions, Uganda is part of the Commonwealth and we have in the past excluded such members for taking actions against the spirit of the Commonwealth.


Finally

Speaking of the Conservative positioning on gay issues Nick said:

"He [David Cameron] is a confection. I don’t really know what he believes in. I don’t know what his convictions are and the reason is because they keep changing – and they seem to change for convenience. So when it mattered, when people went through the lobby to vote on Section 28, his convictions were on the wrong side. Suddenly they’ve changed and we get an apology!"

Mr Clegg questioned the Tory leader’s record of supporting gay equality, highlighting how Mr Cameron voted against the repeal of Section 28 (he last year apologised for the Tories’ introduction of Section 28) and how he has allied his party with right-wing anti-gay groups in Europe.

"The surveys of a lot of the next generation of Conservative MPs show massive residue of indifference at best, prejudice at worst [to the subject of gay rights]."

Nick is also being interviewed in the February edition of Attitude magazine which is out this week. But as I haven't seen that article a separate blog entry will probably follow.

Campaign Against Homophobic Bullying.

The Liberal Democrats have today unveiled a new campaign aimed at ending homophobioc bullying in schools.

The camapaign has three aims that:


1. Homophobic taunts and name calling in schools should be challenged immediately by staff.

2. All schools' anti-bullying policies should be required to include measures specifically to deal with homophobic bullying.

3. At least one teacher in every school should undergo training which includes how to tackle homophobic bullying.

As someone who was a victim of some homophobic bullying at school I reckon this campaign is long overdue but looks like it has established keys issues and strategies to deal with this problem.

So add you support by signing the petition.