Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Consider You're in the Poorhouse w' All of Us


Following Gordon Brown's speech Charlotte Gore has a wonderful post, about him returning us to Victorian Dickensian Britain, not that he'll call it that of course. Also after what will be 13 years of Labour promising to reform the Lords and the Commons, we're going to have to wait for a fourth Labour term for them to fulill those promises of the spring of 1997.

So I was insired about what is a poor single teenage mum called Olive, ends up being led to one of his poorhouses by the queen dodger Woeful Monica.

[WOEFUL MONICA]

So, Olive and wean, you're coming with me.

[OLIVE (spoken)]
Are you sure Mr. Gordon won't mind?

[MONICA (spoken)]
Mind?!

Consider yourself at home.
Consider yourself a scourge of society.
We've taken to you so strong.
It's clear we've messed our lives up wrong.
Consider yourself locked in
Consider yourself making the furniture.
There isn't a lot of space.
Who cares?..What ever we've got is ace!

If it should chance to be
We should see
Some Labour days
MPs have their ways
With us?
Always a-chance we'll meet
Somebody
Who passed the bill
While their voting at the House!
Consider this house your fate.
We don't want to have no fuss,
For after some consideration, we can state...
You're in the Poorhouse
Now with us!

Consider yourself...

[OLIVE]
At home?

[MONICA]
Consider yourself...

[OLIVER]
A scourge of society

[KAREN]
We've taken to you

[OLIVER]
So strong

[ANN WALKER]
It's clear...we're...

[ALL]
Not gonna to get along

[MONICA]
Consider yourself...

[CHARLEY BATES]
Locked in!

[MONICA]
Consider yourself...

[KATE]
Making the furniture

[OLIVE]
There isn't a lot to space

[ALL]
Who cares?
Whatever we got is ace

[MONICA]
Nobody tries to be lah-di-dah or uppity--
There a hit-o'-E for all.

[ALL]
Only it's wise to be handy wiv little 'ne
When the social comes to call!

[MONICA]
Consider yourself
Our mate.
We don't want to have no fuss

[ALL]
For after some consideration we can sate

[OLIVE]
I'm in the poorhouse

[MONICA]
Yes!

[ALL]
W'all of us!

[COMPANY]
Consider yourself at home...
We've taken to you so strong.
Consider yourself locked in...
There isn't a lot to space
If it should chance to be
We should see
Some Labour days
MPs have their ways --
Will?
Always a chance we'll meet
Somebody
Who passed the bill --
When they voted in the House!

Consider this house your fate.
We don't want to have no fuss
For after some consideration, we can state...
You're in the poorhouse...
W'all of us!

[MONICA]
Consider yourself

[ALL]
At home.

[MONICA]
We've taken to you

[ALL]
So strong

[MONICA]
Consider yourself

[ALL]
Locked in.
There isn't a lot to space.
Nobody tries to be lah-di-dah or uppity.
There's a hit-o'-E for all
Only it's wise to be handy wiv the little 'ne
Wen the social comes to call

Consider Brown's house your mate
We don't want to have no fuss
For after some consideration we can state
You're in his poorhouse
W'all of us...

For after some consideration we can state
You're in Brown's poorhouse
W'all of us...

[OLIVE]

If it should chance to be
We should see some Liberal days,
Happy MP ways,
For us.

[MONICA laughing then speaking]

Olive, get real next you'll be saying. "Please Nick can I have some liberty?" or, "Where is Chancellor Vince?" Don't you know that the voting system means we'll stuck here. We've as much chance of Ole Brown of Cameron actually rather than reviewing changing the situation.

2 comments:

Charlotte Gore said...

Brilliant :)

Stuart Winton said...

Must be an old photo Stephen; the FCUK logo isn't even fashionable among hardcore chavs these days.

My apologies for using the c-word, by the way ;0)

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